Our next interview in the series is from the wonderful Jenny Ricketts. Thank you so much for sharing.
When did you first realise you had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome?
At the start (March 2017) I knew I’d overdone it, but at the time I thought that’s all it was or I had Post Viral Fatigue and I just needed to build up my energy. It probably wasn’t until after I didn’t recover from an infection in October 2017 that I started thinking of myself as being ill or having CFS.
The getting ill story
The first problem I had was coughing fits after hill reps in February 2017. I began feeling tired at the start of March, but at the time I shrugged it off because I knew I had been training really hard and maybe my body was relaxing now I was starting to ease off. I didn’t feel ill and I didn’t know how else to respond. I continued doing what I’d planned, but after a couple of days I realised it maybe wasn’t just normal tiredness. At the same time, I didn’t have a cold or any notable infection; I didn’t think I was that ill, just a bit tired. Illness had never stopped me before so one week later I tried racing at BUCS. I felt awful after. It was a new to me, I was tired and I didn’t know what was going on.
The first selection races for JWOC (Junior World Orienteering Championships) were a week later and I felt I needed to prove my ability in sprints. I ran both races and although I had some issues breathing there was relatively little impact. I continued to improve over the next 3 weeks and I was almost back to normal, that is until a few days before the JK where I started feeling more tired. Once again, I raced but this time I didn’t get away with it and on the long my breathing was very bad leading to hyperventilation and an ambulance. This time I was really exhausted and it took a lot longer to recover from. Day by day, I started to improve, and I was able to do harder sessions again, it just meant sleep was a little compromised. I got selected for JWOC and I had the attitude that I’d deal with my health after JWOC. Unfortunately, I started to feel more tired in the week before JWOC, I think due to stress. I probably should have pulled out but I didn’t have the head space. I raced at JWOC (although I had to pull out of the sprint), and once again, I massively set myself back. I mostly improved from then on, that is until I got an infection in October from which there was no coming back. Hello chronic fatigue!
What were the initial causes?
Maybe I was unlucky that I got ill just before selection races, which consequently increased stress levels and also tempted me do things I shouldn’t have done. It was my last year as a junior and having been in the shape of my life 2 weeks before selection races I couldn’t let go, especially when I thought I still had a chance. Personally, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I got ill 2 weeks before selection races. I think stress has a bigger impact on all of us than we realise and I think the stress of selection races coming up maybe let an infection take advantage of my weakened immune system.
It’s safe to say I was obsessed with training and I didn’t know how to ease off. Coming into selection races I’d had a great winter with little illness and no injuries. I’d probably worked too hard though and hadn’t given myself enough rest. I come from a swimming background and I’ve always expected my body to do crazy hours. My thinking has always been does it clash and can I fit it in, not paying the slightest attention to if my body will be able to cope. For me, feeling tired was never an excuse to not train – and this was part of my downfall. I didn’t know how to listen to or respect my body.
Throughout the illness I’ve tested positive for Coxsackie, Chlamydia pneumonia, Lyme, Yersinia and Echovirus. I don’t know when I first got each of these or the exact order of what happened, but that maybe doesn’t matter so much. I know I overdid it, I know stress had a big impact and at some point I picked up Lyme and multiple co-infections. Whether that was why I got ill in the first place or the Lyme came after I don’t know. I’m fairly sure I had some infection at the start given the breathing issues for the first year, but I don’t know which one(s).
How are you at the moment?
Mostly good. My concentration has dramatically improved from ~1 hour a day total including socialising in February – 7/8 hours now. I can do some exercise although I’m not yet able to run continuously for very long (unless it’s downhill, then I can make a solid ~5 min!!!)
How do you cope with it all? What keeps you going?
I think one of the main things I’ve learned is to be ok with not being ok. We all have bad days; it’s how we deal with them that matters. I’ve tried to view the whole thing as a way to grow as a person and to learn how to be the happiest best version of myself. That way it still feels like there’s a purpose.I try to write down something I’m grateful for or something good that has happened every day. Sometimes it’s things like orienteering, but a lot of the time it’s been getting out of bed or being able to see. I think I appreciate what I have a lot more than I used to. I find yoga and meditation really help and I’m a lot better at staying in the present than I used to be. Now I mostly don’t think more than a few weeks ahead and I try to be careful about what I allow myself to think about in the past. I try not to look at social media. There’s too much negativity and for me there’s too much running/orienteering which only brings negative feelings.
The feeling of being free and alive by doing things such as orienteering and running has been a big part of keeping me going and the desire to be able to do more keeps me motivated.
Specifically, how did you deal with delaying two years at university?
At the time it wasn’t an option as I was really struggling. I don’t think I had any particular emotion when I decided to take time out as most of my thoughts were on how to get through the day or how to improve. I couldn’t do much work anyway, so it wasn’t a huge shift in how I was living. Although each day felt very long, the days turned into weeks, which turned into months and suddenly it was time to start thinking about studying again.
It was at times mentally hard when all of my friends were together (such as on a field trip) and I knew I wouldn’t be able to see them as much anymore.
What are 3 short pieces of advice you would give to a first year student who has joined EUOC this year
1. Listen to your body – it needs to be looked after.
2. Appreciate and be grateful for every moment.
3. Make sure you’re doing things for the right reason. Be conscious about the decisions you make and try not to take it all too seriously. We orienteer and run because it’s fun.
Finally, what specific advice would you give to someone who may think they have the beginnings of fatigue? What should they do?
-The first thing is to rest. Be kind to your body and let it recharge. At the start it’s especially important and it may just be you need some chill time. Sometimes these things can sort themselves out without it becoming a big deal.
-Be patient and give your body time, it will heal if you give it the right ingredients, and although it may feel like nothing is happening, a lot of progress happens without noticing, so trust the process.
-Try stay calm as best as possible. When your body is in fight or flight mode it can’t put its energy into healing.
-Talk to someone who has been through it. I’m always happy to answer any questions or listen to rants and I’m sure other people who’ve been through it would be as well.
Jenny would also like to share her Attackpoint.
When things first started feeling off: https://www.attackpoint.org/…/period-31/enddate-2017-03-31
Now: https://www.attackpoint.org/log.jsp/user_13085